Tuesday, March 28, 2017

No Time For Looking Back

Sitting with Dad in the nursing home yesterday, I had one of those moments where I just looked at him and my heart ached. Despite the stroke he's doing pretty well, thankfully, and we still have the opportunity to make some more memories. However, I couldn't help but think about all the opportunities I haven't made time for over the past year, five years, ten years. Though to be fair, I think no matter how much time you spend with the people you love, it's never enough.

Of course, I had lots of thoughts on my mind as I struggled to fall asleep last night. Luckily, I'd had a nice convo via text message with an old friend (old as in high school, not old as in old. We're not old. Nope.). We don't talk often enough but he always manages to cheer me up when I need it.

And any time I speak with a high school buddy, I can't help but think about Katie and of course all the opportunities we missed to make memories before she died. In her case, it wasn't a matter of enough time (although, passing away at 33 is far too early), but rather priorities; and that's what I regret the most - that I didn't make our friendship a priority. I figured we were in our early 30s and had lots of time to catch up after having drifted apart because of work and life.

I really miss having her here, and I wish I would have told her that a long time ago. I hope that everyone has a friend like Katie. Someone who will eat an entire bag of cheesy popcorn and watch Dumb and Dumber with you over and over. Someone who goes on a date with a strange individual so that you can go on a date with his cute friend. Someone who answers the phone no matter what time, because she is always there for you no questions asked.

I think about her all the time. Her smile, her laugh, her insane ideas. They all remind me that life is too short even if we live to be one-hundred years old. So take the time to tell people how you feel; what they meant to you; what you wish for them. Pen a note, type an email, drop a Facebook message - whether you spoke to them yesterday or ten years ago. Take the time to say what you need to say, because if you ever lose the opportunity, it will weigh on your heart forever.


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